US/Slovenia: 2nd Half

If we can't win, we can certainly insult. That's my motto. I'll edit this if we manage to get a draw, though, to seem classier. Promise. (Edit: No I won't)

• Big thumbs up to the Slovenia jersey designers. Your nation's colors are red, white, and blue, and your jerseys are green, yellow, and white. Don't worry, no one noticed.
• More near-goals by the US. Stop playing just a tip with my emotions.
• GOALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL DONOVAN!!!!!!!!!!!! (47'): BEST TEAM IN THE WORLD 1-2 POOR JERSEY DESIGNERS Donovan gets behind and absolutely slams one from an 89 degree angle into the top net. Like, literally, the entire top net. It was going to go through the keeper's face if it needed to. U! S! A! U! S! A! U! S! A!
• Near equalizer by Dempsey in the 50th. GET SOME.
• Announcers just described the keeper as being 'afraid of the ball' on Donovan's goal. Word. That's Amurrican firepower.
• Just received a call from my loving girlfriend and turned it away with the reason of it 'being an important part of my life right now.' Sorry, Gie.
• Tim Howard punts it to approximately Nigeria. Excellent.
• US awarded a free kick just outside the box. Put in by Donovan and blasted at the keeper by Altidore. So close.
• Local emergency alert test on the TV. I'm going to kill someone.
• HERCULEZ has entered the game in the place of Gooch. Things are about to get hyperreal. Samsung style.
• GOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLLL BRADLEY (82'): UNITED STATES OF AWESOME 2-2 FC JUNKTOWN YES YES YES YES YES YES YES
• Massive set piece for the US... AND GOAL CALLED OFF ON A FAKE FOUL. Looks like I know who to kill.
• Winner disallowed. Seriously? SERIOUSLY?
• FULL TIME Excellent job, head ref. Enjoy unemployment.
• P.S. Alexi Lalas, I need you right now. Say something extreme. "That ref is a disgrace." Well, that didn't take long. Thank you.