Spain/Portugal: Second Half

I can only rip on Cristiano Ronaldo so much until even I get tired of it. Something funny better happen or I'm boycotting Europe.

• A fair amount the Spanish team looks like they forgot to hop aboard the evolution train. Woops.
• Right on cue, Tarzan almost clears a shot into his own goal. Tarzan bad.
• Really, Portugal? The coolest one-named soccer star you can come up with is Danny? I can only hope this leads to a generation of Thurstons and Everetts.
• GOALLLLLLLL DAVID VILLA (62') Rattles a rebound off the crossbar to take the lead. The guy is an absolute animal. It's just not fair to have a soul patch that sexy AND be that good at soccer. Talk about putting all of your eggs in one basket.
• Spanish defender has his jersey ripped open in the front, simultaneously exposing prepubescently hairless chest and providing a nice Saturday Night Fever vibe to the 70's feel Uruguay has already successfully infused in this World Cup.
• 73rd minute. Ronaldo's thong is probably starting to feel a bit tighter right about now.
• Spain has apparently deemed it a swell time to play keepaway. Portugal might wish to reschedule.
• BCRF count: 2. Ronaldo takes a minie ball to the chest. Oh, no... wait. Forgive me, it was just a slight breeze. ONE MORE to make the over. You have 5 minutes, Ronaldo. Come on!
• Another superbly dealt out red card on a Portugese attacker for a no contact elbow. It was at least 18 inches from making contact with anything, yet the Spanish defender goes down like he took a blow dart to the temple. Even Ken Griffey Jr. couldn't have gotten injured on that play.
• FULL TIME Bracket still alive. The head referee, however, may not be in approximately 15 minutes.